Ask Illeanna!

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Ask Illeanna – Questions Answered!

Published: October 7, 2009

Since I spend a good majority of my time getting acquainted with you
ladies through your questions, I think it is only fair that you get to
know me. Let’s get the basics out of the way; my name is Illeanna and
I’m a 30 year old Latina residing in California. I work full time as
a therapist and also do research and development for a worldwide company
working with mental health and, as if that was not enough, I’m also a
single mother of a two year old. I was a plus size model for many years
and was signed by various agencies in Los Angeles, New York and the
United Kingdom. I, like you, am a SKORCH magazine reader and found my
niche by intertwining my education and fashion into what we all now know
as “Ask Illeanna”. Am I qualified to give advice you ask? Yes. I
feel my background, personal struggles and accomplishments more than
qualifies me to speak my mind. With this said; let us begin this
journey.

xo,
Illeanna

Q: when you are fat or have more weight than you in fact wanted, can we
Truly say – I am happy? – sandraA:

A: YES! When a person is happy they’re happy. Their body size or shade
of lipstick does not matter. Of course there are people that will say
“I am happy…” and not mean it, but that in itself is a different
issue. So, can women of size be happy? ABSOLUTELY!

Q: I constantly ask my sisters and brothers if I am really pretty or at
least decent and of course they tell me yeah but when a man looks at me
I’m passed over, my best friend is my size and she has that confidence
but she’s White so what’s the difference? I’m outgoing and fun but she
gets all the guys. – jaiaA:

A: Let us first state that race has nothing to do with confidence,
attractiveness or size. Now, the fact that you constantly ask your
siblings if they think you are pretty or not is a sign of low self
esteem. This could solely be the reason you are not attracting guys.
Guys are not as egotistic as we believe they are. It is important to be
attracted to someone but it is just as important to know they also think
they are attractive. The only way to fix this is to do some major soul
searching and give your self esteem a boost.

Q: Hey illeanna, I am a freshmen in college and I’ve never dated. Coming
from CA I’ve always been intimidated by the “healthier” girls and
followed my studies rather than a love life. Now it looks like I have
no chance. How do I get on the road to finding a companion? – nina

A: Girlfriend, there is NO timeline for love! It is admirable you have
chosen to dedicate yourself to your studies, but finding a balance for
fun or love is not only necessary it’s healthy. I am going to assume by
“healthier” you are implying thinner, and if so I need to stress the
fact that thinner doesn’t always mean healthier. The majority of plus
size women are indeed healthy. Since you have never dated I would start
off by encouraging you to have a friend set you up and try a double
date. I am sure your campus bookstore is flooding with potential.